My brother was put up for adoption after he was born. He came into our lives when I was around 18. He found us. I adored him more than I had ever adored another male in my life. 

I don’t think I have ever seen my nana, our grandmother, more happy than when she met him for the first time. She adored him as much as I did. I will never forget how his arms felt around me as if I had finally felt what I had been looking for and I didn’t even realize I had lost something! 

One day I thought, I’m going to go and buy and write him a card for everything I/we misssed. So I wrote him cards and mailed them. They said “open on halloween” and ” open on valentines day” and “open on st patricks day.” I thought about every day I had missed with him for the 18 years he was with his adoptive family. Every day I sent him a card and he said he put them all in a drawer to open when the time came. I picked every holiday that society deems worthy of a card, and cards just because.  I wanted him to feel loved. 

It really isn’t hard to show someone an act of loving kindness. A small gesture can mean the world if given at the right time. A gentle word left to a vulnerable, me, today has gifted me with a moment of peace tonight. 

My father was also put up for adoption. I ended up finding HIS biological family. THEY felt about me like I felt about my brother and I felt the same about them too. These families had been brought back together. One of my father’s biological cousins I felt an immediate connection to. Instead of sending cards to me like I did to my brother, he called me. Every week. Cousin Randy. We looked forward to those calls every single week for 10 years. I can still hear his voice in my head. He gave me such a gift because HE became a missing link I didn’t know I was missing until I found it in him He was the father figure I always wanted. 

Sometimes we don’t even know something is missing until someone else fills it. 

I know our story of adoptions are not like others. But in my case in particular I was filled with love like no other, that I carry with me. 

I wonder if my brother ever opened up all of those cards…

14 thoughts on “Adoption 

    1. He stopped talking to me when the rest of the family did when the abuse came out.he made it painfully clear id not hear from him agin.
      But my heart will always love him and i just wondered at 3 am hmmmm did he ever open alllllll of those cards


      1. I’m so sorry to hear that he was among those who abandoned you. To find him and then lose him again must have been very hard on you. Sending my love. xxx

        Liked by 2 people

      2. It was very difficult. He chose my mom and I understand that so I hold no resentment. I just still love him and always will even though the abandonment is still there too

        Liked by 3 people

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